The Fall of Modern Convenience

I'm embarrassed for America. There. I said it.

Let me give you some background...

I do believe my 34th was the best birthday I have ever had. I just got back from an amazing experience in Africa. I visited a very dear friend of 28 years who teaches in Moshi, Tanzania. We did all the things old friends do when they haven't seen one another in a while... We laughed over white wine, reminisced about past shenanigans over red, and stayed up way too late for chicas in their mid thirties... She took me all around Moshi where I met her students and her newest friends. When my birthday rolled around, we took a 2 day safari to Tarangire. It was sort of spur of the moment, but the minute I lifted myself through the Land Rover's sunroof, I realized I was probably embarking on the best leg of the trip. I was in the Garden of Eden. Literally.

Zebras, Elephants, Giraffes, Lions, Leopards all living together in accordance to the natural order of things. Was the Lion the king of the jungle (plain)? After the kill of an unsuspecting gazelle that day, it may have been. Although we did get into it with an Elephant protecting its child and a couple of Monkeys that performed a flawless bait and switch to steal some snack packs and juice boxes from a few amateur lunchers in the park (I wish I had gotten a polaroid of that, it was absolutely hilarious). The kill was the talk of the day. The lion plucked up the gazelle, most likely sickly or slow and separated (ejected?) from its pack, validating the notion that only the strongest survive. After the Lion had his fill and other carniverous animals had feasted from the remains, in came the vultures to pick the carcass clean. I know it sounds

brutal, but it's all a days work. As natural as it seems, not all animals strolling the plains would partake in the feast. The giraffes were totally content digging on their tree leaves.

After a glorious game ride, we went back to our lodge where we were greeted by people from the Maasai tribe. We stayed in a tented lodge armed with flashlights, while Elephants and Leopards leisurely made their way past our tent. Needless to say, there were plenty of instructions to follow while staying there and it was advised that civilians not leave their tents alone. If you wanted to go to the main lodge, a Maasai warrior would have to lead the way.

You see, the Maasai live amongst the Leopards, Elephants and Zebras and have done so for thousands of years. They are well versed in protecting themselves and live in complete harmony with their wildllife friends. They are reluctant to assimilate into a modern (read: Western) way of life. Their traditional diet is meat, milk and blood, but as of late, there is less meat and more grain. Basically, they live in accordance to the natural order and are healthy because of it. The average Maasai runner is Olympic ready. There is no excess here. There is no waste. There is no carbon footprint.

Driving back to Arusha, I start to notice the disheartening influence of Western culture. The plastic bottles and plastic bags strewn on the side of the street. The Coca Cola bottles and Fanta bottles casually discarded. I smell the garbage being burned in small fires and notice all the western signs for beer, potato chips and other processed "foods". I'm slowly beginning to miss Tarangire and suddenly want to be called Eve and bitch about my banishment from paradise. However, within all the cultural confusion, I also witness people walking two miles with buckets to get their water for the day. Men dragging carts of heavy crates in wooden wheelbarrows uphill for hours in the African sun. Women with grains, vegetables and fruits on their heads to feed their families. Little girls walking miles on the supple dirt roads amongst the greenest of banana trees to go to school for half day.

Now, I have never had to endure any of this. I've never had to wait for water or sweat for food. My guess is, neither have you. Sarah and I had a lively debate on the fine line between helping and imposing that began with Maasai children asking for candy from the Muzungu driving by in their Land Rovers. Why do we give them candy? Because we are bringing something from our culture to make up for the fact that we view theirs as limited? What's the candy going to do besides rot their teeth? Yes, in America there are certain conveniences that make our daily lives easier. Certain amenities that allow us to focus on non-immediate needs. However, at the end of the day, does this help or hinder? And, may I ask, whom?

Upon our return, Sarah and I had dinner with her African family in Moshi. Mama had prepared a traditional Tanzanian dish of meat and bananas over rice, coconut beans, spinach (that I should have investigated further, as it wasn't the spinach I was used to albeit utterly delicious). She had undoubtedly cooked for a good amount of time to welcome me to Tanzania. Baba had killed a rooster for the feast and had not let us see. There was no easy way out. No convenience that made the effort less than what it should be. I was humbled that they had gone to such lengths to welcome me to their home. Needless to say, the meal was incredible and made me feel at home, somewhere I would return shortly thereafter.

I got off the plane at Dulles and was appalled at the difference. One of my questions in Africa had been answered. Our conveniences have bred an apathetic and lazy people. There were obese people everywhere, huffing and puffing to get to their gates. Being driven by those beeping carts that seem to almost run you over at any given airport. The only food options being fast and fried. Burger King, Dunkin Donuts, Chick Fil A, Five Guys. A six year old, way too big for her age, was being pushed in a stroller, while her chubby legs and feet dragged on the ground. Note to readers: If you have an overweight child whose feet drag on the ground from her stroller, that is a HUGE sign that she doesn't need to be in that stroller. She needs to WALK. Run, actually.

I was born in 1975. I grew up in the 80s and 90s. I can remember when microwaves were new and my grandfather was insistent that I not stand in front of it because the rays would kill me. I can remember when takeout was rare and fast food was something little kids got after a morning of intense exercise. It was not dinner on a Tuesday.

As I watch my fellow Americans gorge themselves on krispy kreme cheeseburgers and microwave meals, I am disgusted. We've become so jaded and so apathetic that we can't even recognize decent, honest food anymore. There is a commercial out that touts real, true, chinese takeout in less than 10 minutes from your microwave. Seriously? If you think you are too busy to go down to the Fung Wah for some takout lo mein, then you need to re-evaluate your priorities. You just aren't that slammed, I refuse to believe that you are. You may be tired, yes, you may be so fucking exhausted that the very thought of opening your refrigerator to chop anything seems like moving a mountain, but you are not too busy. In the time it takes to heat up that non nutritional, glorified bowl of ramen, you can make yourself a healthy meal. So can we please stop complaining, explaining and making up ridiculous excuses? We all know the problem and it is totally up to us to solve it.

There is a horrible reality show (another product of our useless societal norm) that's basically The Bachelor but for "real people". Since when did "real people" translate to "fat people"? There is nothing normal about eating processed chemicals made to taste like food, gorging yourself until you can't walk and then calling yourself a real American. Then again, maybe there is.

Is this what we're trying to teach the rest of the globe? How much better life can be with the conveniences of the Western world? It makes me sick and honestly, it's making everyone sick. Literally. Yeah, I'm talking about the guy who eats at Carl's Jr because it's fast and cheap. The same guy who's rationale is that the fast food is cheaper than the fresh food, making it easier for him to pay for his Diabetes prescriptions. Seriously? That's the biggest circle jerk I've ever heard. Eat the fresh food, you won't have diabetes. I'm a Democrat and believe that everyone in this rich ass country deserves decent health care, however, I'm quickly changing my tune. Why should you deserve the best health care when you can't even be bothered to meet your health care provider halfway?

Get it together people. Take care of yourselves. I'm not telling everyone to live like the Maasai. I'm not telling you to walk two miles a day to retrieve water for the day. I'm just asking you to take a step back and evaluate the way you live your life. Asking you to take a look at they way others live their lives. Take back some control and be mindful of what is put into your body. Just because it's fast doesn't make it good. Just because it tastes good doesn't make it good for you.